everything is not getting any better.
but i really wonder whyy i get so easily fcking jealous with him.
and i dont recall me being this way with my x.
i mean my x had plenty more fans then he does.
each time he goes online,girls would be the one saying hi to him first
not one or two. but damn more then that.
he's testi were all girls.
etc lah.
but whyy wasnt i jealous back then?
i mean.
i get so jealous over small little things.
and it really irritates me.
cos i'm not used to feeling this way.
and each time i feel jealous.
it'd only make me feel stupid.
and at the same time demoralising me.
i hate it.
or maybe because i nvr had a bf who's older then me.
and its like.
we look at things differently.
and we like things differently.
you know.
bikes.
clubbings and stuff.
i'm only 16.
turnin 17 in like 5 mths time.
whereas he's 18.
turnin 19 in 20 days time.
n yesterday i went out to study with him.
went to the block next to mine.
and after he stop making notes,i was still stressed with my maths.
so he just sat there and looked.
while i was too engrossed with my work.
he sent a msg to my hp.
and u know.
those words really touched me.
i went over and gave him a hug.
and i know those eyes nvr lie.
i'm not really sure if i saw what i saw.
but i saw tears building up in ur eyes.
and u said u wanted to throw something
as an xcuse to wipe it away?
dear,
i really love you.
maybe thats y,
right now.
i dont know what to do.
we started of with a great start.
n how we pulled thru every other obstacle together.
i really dont want any of those to go down the drain.
neither do i want only memories of you left.
and i'm not sure if we hang on,
its worth the ride.
but baby,
all i need is for u to prove it to me.
and maybe we'll pull thru this one.
just like we did before.